I’ve heard it said before that you are often the average of your closest friends. That can be an exciting or terrifying thought, depending on who your friends are.
So how do you know if someone is a great friend? Or more importantly … how do you know if you are a great friend?
Some people would define a great friend as someone they have a lot of fun with, or someone who makes them a better person. Others might say that a great friend knows them well, or someone they tell everything to. Here’s the common thread I’ve seen with great friendships:
Great friends show up.
Great friends show up when it’s difficult and when it’s easy. Great friends are present. When you need help, they don’t complain about helping you. If you need to vent, they’ll listen — and when needed, tell you that you might be wrong. A great friend is someone who picks you up at the airport at midnight, or drives a long way to help when your car breaks down. A great friend stays even when it would make sense to run away — they show up.
Here’s what I know you’re thinking right now: “Man, I wish I had friends like that.”
If you’re saying that to yourself, I have to ask you a question: are you that kind of friend to anyone else? Do you show up? Often, we are our own worst enemies. The thing that could be keeping you from have fulfilling friendships is your inability to show up.
Do you always look for excuses when someone needs your help? Do you pretend to be “busy” when someone wants you to help them move? Nobody wants to be around someone like that all the time.
Great friends show up. So, start showing up.